On reflection, it seems like Carl Hiaasen and the Palm Beach charity set have been circling one another for some time. Hiaasen is, after all, the crime fiction world’s foremost satirist, and Palm Beach, the uber-wealthy Florida enclave, has revealed itself in recent years as hopelessly, ridiculously corrupt, and that’s before you factor in the current President’s ties there. So with all that in mind, Squeeze Me (Knopf, 2020), Hiaasen’s newest book, is something of an event. The novel begins, appropriately enough, with a charity ball, where one of the doyennes turns up dead. The woman was a fervent supporter of the President, which drives the White House to make a statement suggesting his favorite bogeyman, immigrants, had something to do with her death. Meanwhile—this is a Hiaasen novel, there’s always a meanwhile—Palm Beach is on the cusp of a real invasion, this one from pythons, and they’re hungry. Anyone who’s has the pleasure of reading Hiaasen before knows that these disparate events will soon entangle in uproarious fashion, with a few dozen more or less dangerous and corrupt figures skewered along the way. Squeeze Me is worthy material for Hiaasen, who retains an assured, inimitable voice. I caught up with him to discuss Florida corruption, the Palm Beach charity circuit, and finding a place for humor in dark times.
Dwyer Murphy: For those readers who may not be familiar, is there an anecdote you can share that captures the essence of the strange and highly particular world that is Palm Beach, Florida?
Carl HIaasen: Palm Beach is one of the few places left in America where you can still drive around in a Rolls Royce convertible and not get laughed at. All you need to know about the utter weirdness of the island is that both Rush Limbaugh and Howard Stern have homes there. Also, Jeffrey Epstein moved into town and nobody asked where he got his money, or why he “invited” all those extremely young women to his parties.
Murphy: The current President figures into the new novel pretty prominently. Did you find he was an easy character to fit into the Hiaasen rogues’ gallery or was it a struggle to portray him properly?
Hiaasen: There’s a character in the novel that, I’ve been told, somewhat resembles the current President, and an estate that, I’ve been told, resembles Mar-a-Lago. To use Donald Trump himself as a character would have been challenging because his real-life behavior transcends satire. Still, I admit it was impossible to resist writing some scenes that were inspired by Trump’s own true words, deeds, and grooming habits. And let’s not forget that creepy fake tan….
Murphy: So are invasive species a big problem in Florida? Where do they rank among the state’s issues to tackle?
Hiaasen: Florida is crawling with invasive species, and the huge Burmese pythons featured in Squeeze Me are at the top of the most-dangerous list. Their abundance—and boundless appetite—are accurately depicted in the novel. I’ve gone on a couple of python hunts but had no luck finding them, though friends of mine have captured some monsters. The snakes are steadily moving north from the Everglades and, trust me, it’s only matter of time before some of them show up at Mar-a-Lago—which I would pay big money to see, by the way.
Murphy: Any trepidations wading into the political arena for this one? Was there any particular event that prompted you to do it?
“Anyone who reads my newspaper columns knows I wade with a machete into the political arena every week.”Hiaasen: Anyone who reads my newspaper columns knows I wade with a machete into the political arena every week. Most of the novels I’ve written—even the kids’ books—deal as a subtext with issues like crimes against the environment and political corruption. The big difference in Squeeze Me is the size (literally) and the unchained ego of this particular gasbag, who happens to be the sitting President with a mansion in Palm Beach. He’s definitely not as good at spelling as the other politician-characters that have made appearances in my past novels.
Murphy: Have you spent much time in the charity ball circuit? It gets a pretty good skewering in Squeeze Me.
Hiaasen: Not surprisingly, I don’t get invited to many fancy charity balls. Most journalists don’t. Still, I’ve been to enough of these events to have absorbed the high points of the scene, and of the crowd. Years ago, I went to a fundraiser at Mar-a-Lago and accidentally met Trump. He was trying to hit on my then-wife at the time. She and I laughed about it later, never imagining the guy would be in the White House some day.
“If your specialty is writing satire, it’s challenging to invent something more amusing than what actually goes on at some of these parties.”Don’t get me wrong—these charity events do raise lots of money for very good causes, but they also cost a ridiculous fortune to stage.
Again, if your specialty is writing satire, it’s challenging to invent something more amusing than what actually goes on at some of these parties. When I was working on Squeeze Me, I subscribed to the Palm Beach Daily News (locally known as the Shiny Sheet), which chronicles all the fundraisers and galas on the island. The photos alone were inspirational.
Murphy: You’ve had an impressive career bringing humor into tales of corruption and crime. Any advice for readers struggling to maintain some levity in the given moment?
Hiaasen: For me, writing funny novels has always been a form of personal psychotherapy. I’m half-Norwegian and we’re cursed with a certain inner gloom, even in the best of times.
I don’t know about everybody else, but these days—under the grim weight of the pandemic and nationwide social unrest—I find myself almost frantically looking for something that will make me laugh, or even just smile. Since March my girlfriend and I have probably watched every episode of “Seinfeld” about seven times.
I think it’s true that people desperately need humor to survive times like this, to get past the bleak headlines and see some daylight. My hope is that this novel gives folks somewhere to turn for a laugh, in between covid bulletins from the CDC.
